Hello Colleagues,

One may have a feeling of difficulty while dealing and releasing their anger. However, following these simple ways can help you deal with the same with panache.

Recognise the anger you're feeling.
That may sound simple enough,but it's the biggest obstacle we face. "Anger may be denied because we feel too guilty about it, or afraid of it," says Dr. Leo Madow. As a result, the feeling is turned inside where it festers.

What made you angry?
Ask yourself a very important question: Is this worth getting angry over? If it's a small annoyance that's ticked you off as it is in the majority of angry episodes - forget it. If you can't forget it, then perhaps the source of your anger goes beyond this simple incident. Seek out the underlying cause of your hostility. Bring your feelings to the surface and deal with them.

Give the "Cause" the benefit of doubt.
Instead of inflaming your anger by feeding yourself such thoughts as "Who does he think he is for treating me in this underhanded way!" Suggest yourself that perhaps this person is having a bad day. Come up with a reasonable justification for the behaviour - something that you can understand and relate to.

Count to ten or practice breath awareness or practice some form of mental relaxation.
Most psychologists agree, there's nothing to be gained by an explosive outburst aimed at retaliation. Calm down first, then discuss the conflict rationally.

Make your grievance known without attacking the other person.
This calls for tact and some good communication skills. One important tip: Register your complaint using "I" instead of "YOU". For example, instead of saying, "You're acting unfairly and you're wrong," it is far more effective to say, "I feel hurt. What you're doing doesn't take my needs into account."

Listen.
It is yet another tough technique to master. But try to do so. Listen hard. And above all, understand. This is the key step in resolving a conflict. And resolving the conflict is, after all, the key to safely diffusing your anger.

Forgive.
"When you forgive someone (and this includes yourself), several positive psychological and physiological changes take place." Writes Rick Ingrasci, M.D. "You feel warm and more relaxed, you sigh and breathe more easily, your heart feels warm and soft, your blood pressure and heart rate drop, you may even cry. But most importantly, through forgiveness you once again experience the love that is the essence of your relationship. You remember that you care about this person - which could be the reason that his/her behaviour hurt so much in the first place.

Htesh